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Quitting Is For Quitters

3 Mar

I love blogging about advertising. I also love exploiting the idiosyncrasies and downright stupidity of my coworkers here at the agency. But I’m out of steam and considering giving up Agency Tart. Haven’t quite decided, but I’m sure after getting liquored up tonight, I’ll have made some kind of decision. Will keep you posted. Will also try not to drunk post, which is almost as bad as drunk texting.

I Don’t Want To Marry Anyone

21 Feb

I love Ted Royer’s (ECD, droga5) article on the Boards Magazine site entitled “I want to marry a producer“. It made me think that I should look for a producer to date too, as I could then be “self-indulgent, self-congratulatory” and “self-absorbed”. Oh. But I already am all those things. Which probably means I missed my calling as an executive creative director. Read the article…reminds me why I try not to date guys in the industry…just sleep with them (I kid..mostly). Ted could be attractive though…in that self-absorbed, self-indulgent, looks-like-a-frat-boy, typical creative director way.

Ted

Another (Mo)ron

19 Feb

More cover letter goodness. I’m going to wallpaper my office with this shit.

“I’m always the middle (wo)man…and I’m okay with that. Friends say I’m resourceful and family just say I’m nosy. To you that means a high performing interactive leader who sees the big digital picture with crystal ball-like clarity and problem solves with little or no guidance. I’m a strategic visionary who uses humor, finesse and gumption to secure buy-in at all levels. The rest? Well, you can see for yourself.”

Resourceful and nosy. Sounds like she’s a pickpocket in her spare time. Or my ex mother-in-law. Same thing.

UPDATE: I accidentally deleted a comment that asked what I think is a good cover letter. A good cover letter doesn’t sound as if it was copied out of Cover Letters for Dummies. If it uses industry terminology, it better be in context. And don’t be too quirky. Quirky’s fine in person – in an email it makes you sound psychotic and desperate. Attaching your bank routing and account numbers also works to garner my interest.

Finally, I Can Breathe!

15 Feb

Jesus, this week was extra-crazy. I’m back to my normal self today. Was traveling yesterday and sat next to this guy who decided to tell me all about his recent rehab stint and how he’s a history professor at NYU. Right. Then he mentioned his brother works at W+K and wants to move out here, so I gave him my card because I’m still desperate for people. Instead of an email from the brother, I get this:

Fucking Weirdo

Then, on Valentine’s Day, I get this psycho one-liner:

Valentines

His brother better not fucking call me. I will reach through the phone and beat the hell out of him.

Totally Disappointing

14 Feb

Jeez YouTube. Get your friggin act together. When the most interesting thing at your party is Anderson Cooper, there’s a problem. And what was up with all the suits and ties? You looked like monkeys. Bad monkeys.Thank god for sweet, sweet liquor.

6372

13 Feb

That’s how many times the word “content” has been used so far at this YouTube Videocracy thing.

Now’s The Time To Go Digital

6 Feb

I’ve interviewed too many people in the past 2 days and they’re all worthless. I’m at the point where I don’t give a flying fuck whether you know interactive or not. Just have a personality, and we can build from there. We can teach you UX. Can’t teach a sense of humor.

Managing Partner: What did you think of that last candidate?
Me: He was an asshole.
MP: Jennifer said he reminded her of me.
Me: Right. On to the next one.