You Too Can Work At Our Shop

10 Feb

Maybe my standards are too high. This week, I’ll take anyone who’s breathing and not a plagiarist. Some moron sent me his resume last week and it came with a stellar cover letter. I wonder from what book/website he lifted this. Here’s the first sentence:

Today’s marketing professionals are integral strategists in the profitable resolve of complex entities. If you are in need of a multi-talented coordinator, with a cross-functional background as in advertising, marketing and communications with excellent communication skills…we should talk.”

This guy should be blacklisted from advertising, even if by the slimmest chance he wrote this himself. What a bunch of bullshit. He’ll fit right in.

4 Responses to “You Too Can Work At Our Shop”

  1. mikelite February 11, 2008 at 11:27 am #

    why do people think you need to drown your reader in gobbledy-gook to be taken seriously?

  2. LimitedTimeOffer February 11, 2008 at 2:05 pm #

    Perfect! I was wondering how to bill my lunch hour.. Insert notation: “time spent in profitable resolve of complex entities”, which aptly describes digesting that lasagna.

  3. Ben Kunz February 16, 2008 at 4:53 pm #

    Hire him. He is fluent in corporatespeak and will be brilliant in biz dev with marketing directors seeking paradigm shifts.


  1. Czeltic Girl » Next time, use English - February 20, 2008

    […] you’re going to write a resume cover letter, don’t write it like this. You just sound like a schmuck who needs a good punch in the […]

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