Client gives me one-of-a-kind-can’t-be-replaced-museum-quality assets to use in a photo shoot for a comp revision which is due on Thursday. I give these to one of my project coordinators to give to the creative team. He leaves a message on the project lead’s phone this morning saying he’s taken a position at another agency and won’t be returning to work. He has all the assets with him and won’t answer his phone. I’ve got a position that I’d like him to take and it includes my fist in his face.
UPDATE: I drove over to the kid’s house and scared the bejesus out of him. I got the stuff back.
And I’m not talkin’ about our project manager’s surgical enhancements. Nearly everyone in our agency is producer or director-level! And it’s not just our agency. Our media managers are even called Brand Reach Directors. Clients have no idea this is all posing – they’re just happy they’re talking with someone “important”. I guarantee you there is an agency out there where everyone is a vice president. It’s just too bad no one here can do any work now.
You know you’re SOL when the client starts talking about competing agencies during the pitch. Even our surgically-enhanced project manager (complete with one too many buttons undone and her unmentionables peeking out) couldn’t grab their attention. It all started out so well – the CD brought his uncharged Mac sans power cord, the projector died and the client’s brand police gave us a shakedown. It totally made my day! Our new business manager seems to think we still have a chance. I think when you get hired for that position, HR issues you horse blinders along with your insurance package and laptop. Try making your own horse/co-worker analogies – it’s fun!
There’s this new project manager on our team (let’s call her Amy) who is either extremely inexperienced or one of the more bizarre people I’ve met in advertising. We kicked off a project this morning with a new client (not the software folks) and afterwards, along with the notes from the kickoff meeting, I got this via email:
Thank you so much for the opportunity to work with you on this upcoming project. I feel that my strengths as a certified project manager will lend themselves to our client. Please do not hesitate to contact me at any time and again, I look forward to collaborating with you on this.
WTF is that?! Is that a thank you letter for a job interview? Did she copy and paste that off of a resume site? So so so so strange. What makes it even more bizarre is that she sits 4 feet from me.