Lobster Claws For Hands

Would you rather have lobster claws instead of hands or duck feet? I think I’d rather have duck feet, although I’d have to give up the Leopoldos I got for a steal over the weekend. This is one of my favorite questions of all time (along with the wheels for feet/chopsticks for hands quandary), so imagine my surprise this morning when I see a picture on Adfreak of the very thing (okay, they’re crab claws but same difference)! Deutsch New York did this very nice avatar generator within a microsite, called Build Your Wild Self, for the Bronx Zoo. Very nice children’s-bookish illustrations, as well.

Let’s Get This Project Started

Project kickoff is the best. You get to brainstorm, blue sky, all that crap. Then the next day, reality hits when the client calls you and says they want to up the due date. Or they can’t provide assets until a week before the traffic date.  Or your project manager gets the whole schedule wrong because of her syphilitic dementia. But today is good.

I hate to admit this, but I’ve only seen one episode all the way through of the Simpsons. Yes, I know it’s genius. I have no excuses. Some of you are probably anxiously awaiting the movie this summer, so check out the microsite – you know I love anything I can customize, and you can make your own Simpson character.  No clue who did the site, but it’s very good.  I’m clapping alone in my office right now.

Head Like An Orange

Karl Pilkington’s new site is genius. The simplicity, the illustrations, the seamless video, I love it. Interactive agencies keep trying to outdo each other on how many bells and whistles their site has, and it’s getting embarrassing. I mean, look at the hot mess of a site Dunkin Donuts is doing for their iced coffee push. The K-Man’s got the right idea, as always.

I don’t care about your damn car

I love our semi-open work environment, where we can all share ideas and insult each other. But smelly Jeans Guy won’t stop his incessant chatter about his Porsche Cayenne and his wife’s new 5 series BMW. So when he got rear-ended two days ago and and complained all day about the $12k repair costs I laughed in his face. Mean, maybe. Satisfying, definitely. Today he thinks he has whiplash, so I keep calling his name when he’s walking in front of me so he has to turn his head around.

Check out the site for Argentinian artist Ricardo Liniers (below) – Saltamonte did a fantastic job of showcasing his work. He would be fabulous to use on an interactive site – reminds me of high level Adidas microsite illustrations. Turn the light off on the desktop – the little guy has decidedly more neck rotation than Jeans Guy.

Clients and Public Restrooms

Finding out one of your biggest clients is completely unethical and morally corrupt is like sitting down on a toilet seat in a crowded public restroom and the seat being really warm. It’s gross and off-putting, but you stay there because you really have to go and you already have your pants down.

Brahma Beer has the coolest microsite out, creative done by Park Studio in Moscow. It lets you decorate your own VW van with some funky stuff – easy to use and subtly branded. Besides, anything that combines beer and automobiles is tops in my book.

We like your boards, but…

can you re-do them all? We did 36 storyboards for a TV commercial for a client. In the presentation just now they said, “We love it! But can you re-do them in a different setting, same concept?” And they want them by Tuesday. I’ll just have the illustrator pull them out of his ass and they’ll be ready in the morning.

Check out this new site featuring advertising agency interiors – This Ain’t No Disco. It’s fabulous.I love Soap‘s frosted windows, but not sure if I could work with someone sitting right across from me. Thank god I have a wall between my cube and the guy next to me, because he wears the same jeans every day and he smells a little.

I Like Uploading Heads

Anytime a site asks me to upload a photo and then lets me crop the head (like Paloozahead), I love it. Why? Because it usually makes people look like they have a really fat head. So when I saw the new Adidas site (by glue) on Favourite Website Awards, I was excited.  The site and animations are very well done and  I got to upload our operations manager’s three chins! Thanks, glue.

The voodoo that they do

This is why I hate you know who – they don’t seem to have a weak spot as far as creative goes (even though they smartly sourced Psyop for the animation). I bet some of them smell and have bad hair, though. You can just tell. Take a look at this new spot for Fanta – the little fat animated people are cute. You won’t even miss those Fanta girls.

(Ogilvy, New York/Psyop)

The Emperor’s New Clothes

Dial really got sold a bill of goods on this microsite for Dial for Men (no offense to the agency who I won’t mention…). After seeing the illustration of the guy (below), I threw up in my mouth a little bit. Maybe it’s because I imagine that’s the way our agency’s search guru looks like naked, but it’s probably because it’s just plain bad.

Jesus. Cross. Fitness. Jesus!

I really, really don’t know what to say about this banner ad (below) I saw on FitSugar tonight (I love the whole TeamSugar thing, regardless) for a company called the Lord’s Gym. At first, I thought it was a joke, but then I clicked on it and realized…well, I realized there are some people out there who are very….different. As far as the creative goes, scaring people with bizarre images does not induce qualified click traffic. I wonder how many impressions the gym bought on the network and if we’ll all be seeing the ads everywhere soon. What do you think? I really want to make an off color joke about this ad….it’s too easy!